Continuing with Dinner Etiquette

Today I'm going to start with the place setting and what all those utensils are for and when to use them.  It can be a little overwhelming to sit down to a formal dinner and see 5 to 11 or more pieces of silverware in front of you.  Where do you start and what's the proper one to use for each course of dinner?

First, I should start with what you do immediately after sitting down.  Once you have been seated, remove the napkin from the table and put it in your lap.  Next, don't play with your table setting.  If you have glasses with a beverage it's alright to have a drink.  If the beverage is one that you add sugar or some other condiment to, that is alright to do as well.  If you use a utensil with that condiment, remember what you read in the second paragraph following this one.

The standard rule of thumb on silverware in front of you is to use them from the outside and work your way in towards the plate.  Usual setups have forks on the left and knives and spoons on the right.  Dessert forks and/or spoons are above the plate normally.  If you have a bread plate at the table setting, it may or may not have a butter knife laid across it.

If you have concerns about using the correct utensil, wait and follow the lead of the host/hostess or others at your table.  You don't need to be the first to pick up a utensil.  However, once you do pick up a utensil never let it touch the table again.  By that I mean the end of the utensil that you use (blade of knife, prongs of fork or bowl of spoon).  Either place the entire utensil on a dish or lean it so the handle only touches the table.

Of all the utensils, only the soup spoon has a required way of use.  When you use a soup spoon it should be entered into the soup moving away from you.  You just skim the soup and be sure to run the bottom of the spoon over the back of the soup bowl.  This helps remove soup that could drip on you as you move the spoon to your mouth.  Please remember not to slurp your soup.  Noises while you eat are normally not a good thing.

When you have finished a course, what you do with your utensil can signal to the serve that you are done.  Put  your utensil face down on the plate or in the bowl with the handle facing 4 or 5 o'clock.  Use your plate as the clock with 12 at the top and 6 closest to you.  The reason you put the handle that way is because servers usually clear from the right.  This lets them have some control over the utensil so it doesn't end up in your lap or on the floor.

Going back to the beginning of your meal, I have a few more points to make.  First, don't start eating until one of the following happens.  It depends on the size of your event.  If you are at the table with the host/hostess, you don't start eating until they take their first bite.  They lead the table in what is happening throughout the meal.  At a larger function, it is proper to wait until everyone at your table has been served a course before anyone starts eating.  I would wait again for the host/hostess to start if there are only 2 or 3 tables at the dinner.

While enjoying the meal, it is again proper to taste everything served.  It is an insult to the host/hostess not to.  That doesn't mean you have to finish it or that it has to be a large amount you taste.  It is also not proper to have more than three bites of the same food before tasting another item on the plate.  If a food item requires cutting to a bite-size to eat, only cut one piece at a time and eat it before cutting another.

A question I always get when I do an etiquette dinner is: "What do I do if I can't swallow something in my mouth?"  It may happen that there is a piece of gristle or bone in a bite or something is causing a gag reflex.  If you have one of these experiences, just use your napkin.  Take a corner of the napkin and bring it to your mouth as if you were going to blot your lips because of food or something on them.  As you blot carefully push the item from your mouth into the napkin and roll the napkin a little and replace in your lap.  Be sure to be careful the rest of the meal with your napkin.  By doing this most if not all others at your table will never know you had a problem.

I could go on for days on the subject of dinner etiquette but yesterday and today's comments should give you a good start.  Please use the comment section of the blog to ask questions if some of this has been confusing.  If it creates more questions on other aspects of etiquette, be sure to ask those as well.  I hope this has helped some of you and refreshed others of their knowledge.

Tomorrow's blog is a recipe for Freezing Fresh Corn and then on Friday the recipe is for Baked Stuffed Tomatoes.  Enjoy!

Do You Know Your Dinner Etiquette ?

I've had requests for information on proper dinner etiquette from several blog readers over the past year.  Since this blog is to help new and inexperienced cooks I'll make the assumption that many are young and could use the knowledge.  For others of you that follow me let's consider it a refresher on some item or two that you might have forgot.

I have talked at many etiquette dinners over the length of my career.  I prefer doing it at an actual meal so that I can observe and point out areas of concern to the guests.  I will try and cover the basics in today's and tomorrow's blog.  If you have questions after reading both days, please use the comment section on the blog to reach me.  Thank you.

To start, what is etiquette and why do we need it?  Etiquette is just a fancy term for manners or behavior that one should display or use in a particular situation.  There is a proper etiquette for almost everything we do.  To help relate to your world, there is an etiquette for phone calls, use of cell phones, e-mails, driving and many more things that you do daily.  We're only going to concentrate on table manners at dinner (or any meal).  The need for etiquette is so we have rules of behavior that show we are different from other animal species.  I believe in the beginning when the first books came out on etiquette that it was to help show a difference between different classes of people.  The poor did not have the refined skills and manners of the rich.

There are many people that have written the books or set the guide lines for what is proper etiquette.  The two most famous are probably Emily Post and Amy Vanderbilt.  Something you will find interesting is that all these people don't agree on every issue of etiquette.  So to me it comes down to just using "Common Sense" and being "Consistent in your actions."

There is nothing to be afraid of or nervous about when it comes to any meal in which you participate.  The biggest item to remember in any etiquette situation is not to bring undue attention to yourself.  You don't want to be noticed for something you did inappropriately.

Enough background on etiquette, let's get started.  I'm going to cover your responsibilities when invited to a dinner, place settings, behavior at the table and some other common sense.

When you are invited or asked to a function/dinner, you need to respond to the host/hostess with an answer in a timing manner and appropriate way.  An invitation should give you the timing and format for accepting it.  It becomes your responsibility to let your host/hostess know if you need to be accommodated in any way.  If you have something that keeps you from eating the meal planned such as an eating disorder, being a vegan/vegetarian, religious or medical reasons.  Another would be any medical condition such as a wheelchair or maybe you are deaf in one ear.  This way if there is assigned seating, you won't be on the wrong side of people to hear.  This way you can be served without bringing undo attention to you and your table.

The invitation should also let know what dress is required for the function.  If in doubt be sure to ask ahead of time.  There is no such thing as fashionably late when it comes to an event.  You don't want to be too early or come late.  It is best to come between 15 and 5 minutes before the stated time from the invitation.

Depending on the type of function you are invited to will help determine if it is appropriate to bring a host/hostess gift.  This is usually only an idea for dinners in the home of the host/hostess.

I'm getting long on today's blog so I will continue this tomorrow.  On Thursday, I have an easy recipe for freezing fresh corn to enjoy year round called Bathtub Corn.  Then on Friday because it is that time of year for fresh corn and tomatoes, I have a recipe for Baked Stuffed Tomatoes.  I hope you have a great week.

Easy Grilled Salmon

Easy Grilled Salmon

(4-6 servings)

Ingredients:

1 ½ - 2 lb. Salmon Filet (skin on)

Sea Salt & Black Pepper

Vegetable Oil for Grill

Directions:

This recipe works best on a gas grill because you can regulate the heat better.  It can be done on a charcoal grill too.  First light your gas grill, turn burners on low and close the lid.  Let the grill heat up for about 10 minutes.  Use a wire brush and clean the grill grates.  Oil the grates using a paper towel soaked in the vegetable oil.  Run the oiled paper towel over the grates five or six times.  Close the lid again.  Now take the salmon filet and salt & pepper the side without the skin.  Be as heavy or light with the seasoning as meets your taste.  Open the lid of grill and place the salmon, skin side down, on the grates.  Close the lid and let the salmon cook for 20 to 30 minutes.  It will depend on the size and thickness of the filet for the cooking time.  To check doneness, use a fork and test the middle of the filet for flakiness.  Use a couple of spatulas to lift the filet off the grill and onto a platter.  Slice into the number of pieces needed and serve with your favorite side dishes.

Note:               You can use more than just salt & pepper on the salmon.  Try putting fresh dill sprigs and thin lemon slices on the top of the filet before cooking.  Maybe spread a little tarragon mustard over the top of the filet.  Use your imagination and taste preferences to create your favorite grilled salmon.

Ideas for Future Efforts

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Summer Salad

Summer Salad

(8-12 servings)

Ingredients:

8 ears Fresh Corn, shucked

6 medium Fresh Tomatoes, ½” chop

2 medium Fresh Cucumbers, peeled, seeded & ½” chop

2 medium Fresh Green Peppers, seeded & ½” chop

1 small Fresh Red Onion, ½” chop

1 large Fresh Jalapeno Pepper, seeded & fine dice

¼ cup Fresh Cilantro, chopped

4 tbsp. White Balsamic Vinegar

3 tbsp. Extra Virgin Olive Oil (extra for corn)

Directions:

Heat outdoor grill to medium-high heat, brush corn lightly with a little olive oil and grill until slightly charred turning regularly.  Let corn cool to handle and cut corn off cob.  In a large bowl combine corn with tomato, cucumber, green pepper, red onion and jalapeno pepper.  Now add cilantro, vinegar and olive oil to the mixture.  Toss well and refrigerate minimum of 2 hours or overnight.  Toss again just before serving.  Salad works well cold or at room temperature.

Note:               If you don’t want to grill corn, it’s alright to just microwave it.  Use either method of the following two links.  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YnBF6bv4Oe4
                        or Fresh Corn on the Cob

Note:               If you have other fresh items you would like to try and/or replace in the salad, go for it.  Part of the fun of cooking is to tailor a recipe to your favorite flavors.

Ideas for Future Efforts

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Fresh Corn on the Cob

Fresh Corn on the Cob

(in a Microwave Oven)

(2-4 servings)

Ingredients:

4 Ears Fresh Corn on the Cob

4 Sections of Paper Towel

As Needed Butter

As Needed Salt

As Needed Black Pepper

Directions:

Clean the ears of corn of husk and silk and wash. Dampen a paper towel and wrap an ear of corn with it.  Repeat this process with the remaining ears of corn.  Doing 1 ear at a time, put it in the microwave and heat on high for 2 minutes.  Leaving the ear wrapped in the towel place on a plate and repeat with remaining ears.  When done microwaving all ears serve with butter, salt and pepper starting with the first ear that you micro waved.

Note:   Experiment with other spices/herbs to sprinkle on our corn or compound butters.  Compound butter is butter and spices/herbs that have been blended together.  A common example would be garlic butter.

Ideas for Future Efforts

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BBQ Sauce

BBQ Sauce

(around 4 cups)

Ingredients:

1 small Yellow Onion, chopped

1 glove Fresh Garlic

½ cup Raisins

2 cups Ketchup

2 tbsp. Cider Vinegar

1 tsp. Dry Mustard

2/3 cup Butter

½ tsp. Dry Basil

¼ tsp. Dry Tarragon

¼ tsp. Dry Rosemary

¼ tsp. Dry Thyme

¼ tsp. Dry Marjoram

½ tsp. Accent

3 tbsp. Brown Sugar

1 tsp. Kosher Salt

½ tsp. Black Pepper

½ Fresh Lemon, juiced

Directions:

Place the chopped onion, garlic glove, raisins and half of the ketchup into a blender and puree.  In a medium sized sauce pan over medium heat combine the mixture from the blender with the remaining ingredients.  Heat the entire mixture to a boil and then reduce heat to a simmer.  Continue to simmer for 45 minute to an hour and then let cool.  Refrigerate in an air tight container for up to a week.

Note:               I consider this a mild sauce so if you need heat, add it.  There are several ways to do it.  You could add a little cayenne pepper or hot sauce to the mixture.  Another way would be to add some hot peppers (jalapeno, hot cherry, etc) to the ingredients going into the blender.  You’ll have to experiment to find the heat level you desire.  Have fun getting there.

Ideas for Future Efforts

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More Grilling & Summer Dishes

The 4th of July is tomorrow (Wednesday) and it's a big day in the United States of America.  There will be lots of fireworks being shot off and family and friends having picnics and other activities to celebrate the day.  The 4th is probably the number one day of the year for grilling (cook-outs).  Hamburgers and Hot Dogs always lead the way but because of the regional favorites there are many other items being made and eaten.

It may be the biggest but it's not the only day for grilling.  I grill year round (or at least I have for the past 20 some years).  Now with the move north (several hundred miles) the winters could make it a little more interesting.  However, I plan to continue to grill year round.  What's a few snow drifts anyway?

For all of you following my food blog, get out there and enjoy your favorite dishes.  That includes all my Russian blog followers too.  It doesn't matter where you live in the world, grilling (barbecuing) is a universal cooking method.

Please don't just stick to your traditional favorites.  Explore other recipes from time to time.  Each season of grilling should find you trying several (at least) new items (recipes) to expand your taste buds and your cooking abilities.  This is one way for you to continue to grow throughout your life.  Have some adventure for life is too short not to.

Because there is a holiday in the middle of the week, I'm only writing one blog.  But I'm putting 3 recipes on for Wednesday, Thursday and Friday.  Tomorrow's recipe is for a "BBQ Sauce" and it is pretty basic.  You can try different ingredients to spice it up or even sweeten it a little.  Try it first and then see if you need or want to adjust it to your taste.

Thursday has a "Summer Salad" for you to try.  It makes a great addition to whatever entree your making for the meal.  Because the "People in the Know" say we need to eat more fish, I have an easy recipe for "Grilled Salmon.  Salmon is one of the fish that is recommended the most for Omega3 and helping your diet.

I hope you enjoy these recipes and have a great (and safe) 4th of July.